Charoleau Gap

Note: When a National Parks guide states "This unpaved road is suitable only for 4WD vehicles"  what they really mean is "This god-forsaken dirt track is suitable only for vehicles with winches, oversized tires, oilpan protectors, short wheelbase, steep entry/exit parameters, roll bars and bodywork you no longer care about.  That macho Ford Explorer V8 LTD with the heavy-duty towing package of yours is suitable only as FILLER for some of the potholes you are going to encounter.  Better stick to suburban grocery runs and the ramp at the Granite Club."

My first clue should have been the statement that "the 40 mile round trip from Tucson should take no more than 5 hours."

My second clue should have been the Sign In/Sign Out sheet at the entrance to the canyon.  The authorities want to be able to see if anyone hasn't made it out yet.

The first mile or so is quite doable.  But the road soon starts to show serious ruts and potholes, where you can drop a wheel and bottom out.  Then it starts to have the odd boulder protrude from the dirt.  Then it alternates steep dips with blind hillcrests where you simply cannot see over your hood to know what way the road bends, or what boulder you are about to polish your undercarriage with.

Just when you think you might still be able to master all these if your colleagues walk in front in tell you what to do, it starts to hit you with several at once.  Your colleages agree that 4.5 hours more of this will stop being fun about 5 minutes ago.  Now you must find a place wide enough to allow you to turn around.

Having done so, you now start to climb back up that steep hill with the sharp bend.  You stop to navigate past the boulder with all the rust scrapes on it.  Now, you discover that the Ford is too heavy a vehicle to start from a standing stop on a 30% gravel grade - all 4 wheels start to spin, and the smell of scorched rubber fills the air.  You can't go back down to get a running start - see previous comment re rusty boulder.  Luckily, when your two passengers get out the vehicle is just light enough to start rolling.

Elfrida and Ian catching up.  Note blind crest.

Thirty minutes later, you are back at the sign-in post, trying to think of something face-saving to write in the "Comments" section of the sheet to explains the early exit time.

I wrote "Needs more bumps."